Deace: The Pam Bondi Show needs to be canceled

I know you thought the Super Bowl halftime show brought to you by a double-digit-IQ reprobate was bad, but Pam Bondi appeared before Congress this week and said “hold my beer.”

She’s playing the Republican base for suckers with her constant night-at-the-improv act. That future gig as a Fox News contributor ain’t gonna happen all by itself.

The memes cataloguing her jackassery simply won’t stop despite Trump’s mightiest efforts to bail her out. I mean, how do you explain away “don’t worry about the Epstein rape island because have you considered where the Dow is?”

Yikes.

The midterms called and said the blue wave is a-coming! We’ve clearly come a long way from “lock her up,” but in exactly the wrong direction. The message is highly radicalized, but the perception increasingly seems to be that we are not delivering on it and perhaps we never intended to.

A lot of politics is perception. That’s just the plain reality of it. It’s why one of my Ten Commandments of political warfare is “never attack what you aren’t prepared to kill.” So if, for example, we pull out of Minneapolis right now and declare victory but Tim Walz, Don Lemon, and Ilhan Omar pay no discernable cost, what has actually been gained?

In fact, the right will have managed to disappoint both sides of its political coalition. First the establishment thought the optics were too violent, and now the base thinks the optics are too cowardly. Then add to that mix elitist talk about the Dow papering over the need to expose the perpetrators of global sex crimes, and prepare for a dire electoral judgment day.

You can personally admire the president and everything he has done for this country (and I do) but still remember that Trump lost about 40 House seats in the 2018 midterms. What about this time? You have to live in the world of actual realities and outcomes. So when the pollster calls you about the current direction of the country and your personal situation includes homes that you still can’t sell and schools that are still trying to trans your kids, you are going to need your affinity for Trump to be doing a lot more heavy lifting than whatever Pam Bondi is bringing to the table on his behalf.

When the base starts to ask why protecting Howard Lutnick is more important than protecting base voters, Houston, we have a problem. But perhaps I’m wrong. Let he who has not brought his family to Epstein Island cast the first stone!

Given that the attorney general is arguably the most important position in the executive branch other than president, I wish I had more to analyze for you than the level of stupid now before us. What would we have said if Hillary Clinton tried something like what Bondi just did before Congress? I don’t know that I have ever seen a figure on the right being more justifiably and savagely ridiculed by her own side.

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Photo by PATRICK T. FALLON/AFP via Getty Images

Does everyone understand what a self-own it was for Bondi to try to own the libs by accusing Rep. Jamie Raskin (D-Md.) of being a crooked inside trader? Because what position in the federal government is uniquely equipped and empowered to find out if Raskin should be punished for abusing his position within the United States Congress? Could it be Attorney General Bedazzler Bondi herself? Good grief.

She’s playing the Republican base for suckers with her constant night-at-the-improv act. That future gig as a Fox News contributor ain’t gonna happen all by itself, is it, Pam?

Meanwhile, and maybe I’m weird this way, I just want to win. And by that I don’t mean something as trite as the final score of a football game. No, winning means saving America for our children to live safe and free. The existential stakes of our current political moment fall nothing short of that.

The cold truth is that Pam Bondi at this point is clearly an embarrassing impediment to that goal. She’s not only not helping us win, but I’ve got a set of binders right here and they all say it’s more likely that she’ll be the reason we lose.