Family with Down syndrome son went from shock to gratitude: ‘Lost the air in my chest’

“I literally felt like I’d lost the air in my chest. I couldn’t speak.”

That was the immediate reaction of a Florida dad and entrepreneur when he learned during an urgent phone call from his wife — who was pregnant with their fourth child and had just finished talking with a doctor — that their new baby might be born with Down syndrome.

“I was sad. I was angry. I was frustrated,” said Aric Berquist, who shared his thoughts both in a video (see the video at the top of this article) and in an interview with Fox News Digital. 

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Berquist said that on the phone call, he “wanted to stay calm” for the sake of his wife, “who was teary” as the couple talked over the news. 

He said, though, that after they hung up, “I just felt this — heard this — voice, say, ‘Who are you to tell me what a blessing is?’”

The deeply faithful Christian parent said the voice “wasn’t angry. It felt strong and it felt safe — and it was so shocking that all of my arm hairs were raised to the point that it hurt.”

He said he found himself “just bursting into tears.”

A subsequent ultrasound confirmed the diagnosis of Down syndrome for their new baby — and the couple did all they could to prepare themselves, and their older children, in every way for the baby’s arrival. 

“He continues to teach me more about life and myself than I could ever dream of articulating.”

That year, the dad said, “Asher was born. And I really do feel that on that day, treasure was put in my hands.”

Berquist went on to describe the joy he believes their youngest has brought the entire family — both from the time he was born and up to the present day, including at the recent wedding of their daughter, the oldest of their four children. 

“That kid has literally changed my life in an amazing way,” he said. 

The couple’s youngest is 13 years old today and in sixth grade.

“And he continues to teach me more about life and myself than I could ever dream of articulating.”

He “loves sports,” added Berquist. “He’ll play flag football and he’s done soccer. He loves to play sports with his two older brothers.” 

“He is available to everyone he engages with.”

He said his son Asher’s bond with his brother, Adam — the sibling closest to him in age — “is one of the richest and most beautiful things I’ve ever seen.” 

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The two are very, very close, he said. 

Their youngest “occupies the current moment like nobody I have ever met,” Berquist also said. “He is present. And he is available to everyone he engages with.”

He makes others feel “acknowledged,” said his dad. “And I’m starting to think that we, as the ‘typical people,’ have the disabilities — not him.”

Today, Berquist also told Fox News Digital, “he’s doing so well. It’s been really wonderful to see how he’s developed — just his growth within each phase. But more than that, it’s been really touching as a parent to see how he’s connected with so many people in his life. It’s been beautiful to watch.”

Changes in development

Heart problems are a concern for children with Down syndrome — and young Asher had bypass surgery within the first three months of his life, his family said. After a week in the hospital, he returned home to his parents and siblings. 

Down syndrome is a condition in which a baby is born with an extra chromosome. 

Chromosomes determine how the body forms and functions. Those born with an extra one experience changes in the way the body and brain develop.

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A baby is typically born with 46 chromosomes. A baby with Down syndrome has a full or partial copy of chromosome 21.

About 5,700 babies are born with Down syndrome each year in the U.S., and over 400,000 people in the country currently live with it, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).

The life expectancy of those with the condition has increased dramatically over the years. 

In 1983, it was just 25 years old — but today it’s 60 years old, per the Global Down Syndrome Foundation, a nonprofit based in Denver, Colorado. 

The most common type of Down syndrome is trisomy 21, which accounts for 95% of all cases. Less common types of Down syndrome are translocation (caused by rearranged chromosome material) and mosaicism (when there is a mixture of two types of cells). 

Not every child with Down syndrome will display the developmental symptoms.

There are no known ways to prevent the condition during pregnancy and no known root causes, experts say. 

One risk factor associated with Down syndrome is the age of the mother. For a 25-year-old pregnant woman, the odds are about 1 in 1,250. At age 40, those odds are 1 in 100, statistics show.

There are both physical and developmental symptoms of Down syndrome. 

Physical symptoms may include a flattened face; shorter height; short neck; small ears, hands and feet; and decreased muscle tone, according to the CDC. 

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Developmental symptoms, meanwhile, may include a short attention span, impulsive behavior, slow learning and delayed speech development. 

Not every child with Down syndrome will display each of these traits.

‘Walk through that day’

A key life lesson for Berquist from raising his son has been about being present.

Know that “your feet are on the ground today,” he said. 

So, “walk through that day.”

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When there are life challenges, he said, “when we walk through things that are tough, we’re being cleaned. We’re being made into something beautiful if we allow it and if we walk through it.”

Berquist also said, “Breathe that air. Engage with that beauty. Because that is your life.”

Angelica Stabile and Ashlyn Messier, both of Fox News Digital, contributed reporting.