Relationship expert weighs in on viral grocery shopping dispute on Reddit

A man’s rant about having to do special shopping errands for his girlfriend divided hundreds of social media users, sparking a debate about relationship expectations.

In a post on a Reddit page with over 24 million members, the man began by noting that he works 12 hours a day while his girlfriend works between four and eight hours.

“At least once a week, she asks me to stop by the store on my way home and grab kombucha (only she drinks) or random other stuff like beer, Diet Coke or snacks,” the Reddit user said.

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“Usually she [goes] grocery shopping that same day and says she forgot an item or so.”

But the requests for her fermented tea drink and other specific choices weighed on him, he said — leading him to finally put his foot down. 

It’s a move that made him “the bad guy,” he said. 

“Considering I leave before her and get home after her with only a few hours at the end of my day to rest, I finally started telling her no, and I am made to be the bad guy,” the man concluded.

The post drew a wave of mixed reactions, with many commenters criticizing the man for his stance.

“You’re already out and probably driving past the store,” one person observed. “Stop at the darn store. It’s not a competition. Just contribute. This is a very immature attitude to have.”

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“Who cleans the toilets? I rest my case,” another said. “You can buy girly pop a kombucha a few times a week. Get her some flowers next time.”

Others supported the boyfriend’s point of view, arguing it was reasonable for him to deny the request.

“I worked [12-hour] shifts for years in the past and I was a zombie during those times,” one person said. “Never was able to get the sleep I needed. I wouldn’t be going to a store unless it was an absolute necessity.”

Another said, “Don’t listen to these delusional people who don’t know what real work is.”

Others were more neutral about the topic — suggesting the issue could be resolved with better communication.

“Talk it out and you can probably find a solution,” one person advised.

“It’s no wonder she doubts his love when he measures things in this cold, tit-for-tat way.”

“Have a conversation with her about it first,” another said. “Once or twice a month is fine, but once or twice a week is not.”

Carole Lieberman, M.D., a psychiatrist based in Beverly Hills, California, shared thoughts with Fox News Digital about the relationship issues at stake.

Lieberman said the boyfriend’s complaints seem valid on the surface but that he is “missing the point.”

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“His girlfriend is asking him to pick up things she ‘forgot’ at the store as a way of proving he loves and cares for her,” the expert observed. 

“It’s no wonder she doubts his love when he measures things in this cold, tit-for-tat way, by the number of hours they each work.”

Lieberman stressed that love “shouldn’t be measured – it should be given freely and warmly.”

She added, “If he tries it, he’ll see the rewards.”