Democrat Eggsistential Crisis: Trump Dumps Cackleberries But Americans Have to Dye Taters for Easter

Ah, the Theater of the Absurd continues. It’s also known as Life as Seen Through Desperate Democrats’ Eyes.

They are all bizarre, pathetic, frantic, and futile exercises in frustration and self-delusion practiced by a rudderless party in a suddenly unfriendly American ocean. 

No matter how they splash their oars or send up flares, the rest of the country sails on by.

The latest gambit for attention – the brief SOS blinking on social media that wasn’t spelled ‘Save Our Gangbanger‘ – was about the White House Easter celebration.

While this year it was blessedly topless trans and doddering old POTATUS-free, the Easter egg roll somehow still managed to catch the ire of Grinchy Democrats snarling behind a keyboard, looking for any excuse to manufacture outrage.

This latest terrible Trump transgression was a bit of a reach – a fanciful stretch requiring such a leap of ensuckerment and partiality to being easily bamboozled that hitting ‘send’ should have sent those demented deviants scrambling for ‘Delete delete delete!!!‘ seconds later.

The gist of the ginned-up outrage was that the Trump Easter festivities used real eggs (Yes, we’re apparently still on that) when eggs are so expensive, some American could only afford – wait for it – to dye potatoes.

It was mocked immediately.

It was a meme, and these fools are acting like it really happened. pic.twitter.com/MN0Wk2CsqY

— LeBoulanger (@ribeye996) April 22, 2025

And what should have been the end of this disgraceful outing into gaslighting and Oliver Twisting the truth?

Being who they are, the Democrats doubled down.

Because, of course, they did, and the New York Times told them so.

https://t.co/pLcvBqcWHg pic.twitter.com/g0CbelPzf1

— Democrats (@TheDemocrats) April 21, 2025

VURT DA FURK?

This requires further investigation as the NYT headline definitely says that.

Easter Eggs Are So Expensive Americans Are Dyeing Potatoes

With costs high and supplies short, people are getting creative with Easter egg traditions.

But the article does not.

Hang on here.

It’s an April 3 article that starts with an interview of a dairy farmer known for his family farm’s annual egg hunt switching to plastic eggs…THIS PAST FEBRUARY.

Um…Trump’s been in office, what? Two weeks, schmaybe?

As for the poor folks who have only potatoes to dye – and ‘because of Trump’ goes without saying, even as they grudgingly acknowledge prices are down – this is the single mention of potatoes in the entire article.

…Chicken eggs, the stars of Easter baskets and Easter egg hunts and rolls across the country, are going to cost more than in years past. Even as egg prices are dropping nationwide the anxiety about the cost persists, and many consumers are getting creative at finding substitutes. Videos on how to dye marshmallows, potatoes and even onions have begun to circulate on social media and news websites.

There is not a single photo of a dyed tuber in the entire hit piece.

The Times also waits until damn near the last paragraph of the article to drop this Humpty of a Dumpty on the ‘eggs so ‘spensive’ excuse they’ve let you believe is why the farmer switched to plastic.

…Mr. Young said similar observations spurred the adjustment to Young’s Jersey Dairy’s annual event. “It wasn’t the cost as much as it was the fear of wiping out local inventories,” he said. The money the farm typically spends buying eggs, about $3,000, will instead be donated to two local food banks.

Even as prices were already almost back to normal, the local egg inventories still hadn’t recovered from the Biden administration’s wanton slaughter of millions of chickens, and the farm was cognizant enough of those spot shortages not to want to inconvenience their neighbors.

DAMN THAT TRUMP

Perhaps the angry twenty-two-year-old interns running the DNC X account should have read the article first.

And again, another anti-egg riposte was mocked immediately and mercilessly.

Gosh. Just brutal.

Please show me one family that dyed potatoes. Because, unlike a dyed potato, the eggs are still edible afterwards. It’s a hard-boiled egg, super popular in most health diets. (If somebody is dying potatoes, they probably should not be living without supervision.)😂

— JuliaC (@CorJuliaCU) April 21, 2025

It might also have helped to research a little further to find that, unlike the farmer for his Easter festival, the White House doesn’t send Melania’s staff traipsing out to D.C. area supermarkets and bodegas for 30,000 eggs the week before Easter, stripping fridge shelves of cackleberries.

The eggs for the White House lawn have been donated for decades by the Egg Board courtesy of egg producers across the country and they insisted on doing it again this year after consulting with their member producers.

NBC News had its nose out of joint over the story and tried hard to feed the anti-White-House-egg-roll frenzy, but, once again buried at the end, was everything one needed to diffuse the outrage that never was one.

Headline:

White House plans to use real eggs for the Easter Egg Roll, despite a strain on supply and concern over prices

*sigh*

…The board had several internal conversations about the optics of providing tens of thousands of eggs for the Easter Egg Roll given the burden egg farmers have faced, according to a person familiar with the planning, but decided to supply the event as usual.

…Emily Metz, the president and CEO of the Egg Board, said in a statement that using real eggs this year for rolling along the South Lawn “will not create additional strain on the nation’s egg supply or egg prices.”

“The heart of this event is about bringing joy to children and families, and in these difficult times for egg farmers, it’s important to celebrate wherever we can,” Metz said.

…A person familiar with the White House’s plans confirmed the event will use real eggs. And the Egg Board has been insistent on using real eggs, according to a second person familiar with White House event planning.

This year will mark the first time the Easter Egg Roll has included only small- and medium-sized eggs, which are not sold at markets, according to the Egg Board. 

…The number of eggs at this year’s Easter Egg Roll — 2,500 dozen — is consistent with the number used in previous years. Farmers could donate even more eggs for the White House to use as ingredients to make food it offers at the event, according to the American Egg Board.

Apparently, Joe Biden used the same number of eggs last year – real eggs. Weirdly, there was no squawking about it. And there were already potato-dyeing videos.

GFY, this was 2 years ago and your party caused it . Always projecting your sins. pic.twitter.com/X0rbjC9GjS

— Just-the-facts (@Justthefac4416) April 22, 2025

And if Democrats really want a message to stick about something so ridiculous, they need to have, like, a Signal chat to make sure everyone gets the talking points. You know.

WE’RE USING POTATOES THIS YEAR

Looks like Amy didn’t get the word.

What? I thought ya’ll said eggs were like $900 a dozen?

— Mae Berrie (@MaeBerrie1234) April 21, 2025

Democrats are so sour, you almost feel bad for them – almost.

This Easter, there were no topless trans, no pride flags flying, Easter bunnies didn’t have to haul presidents around, and lots of shrieking happy children…

Today marks the first time in FOUR YEARS that no children were sniffed at the White House Easter Egg Roll pic.twitter.com/IBoeFISAIK

— Shawn Farash (@Shawn_Farash) April 21, 2025

…remained unmolested.

Lots of good eggs and no POTATUS heads.