Experts Urge Parents to Ask Babies for ‘Consent’ Before Changing Their Diapers

A group of early childhood development researchers in Australia is advising parents to begin asking infants for “consent” before changing their diapers, according to a November 2025 guide released by Deakin University, as reported by The New York Post.

The recommendations outline a new approach to diaper-changing that encourages parents to communicate with their babies about the process, even though infants cannot yet speak.

“At the start of a nappy change, ensure your child knows what is happening,” the researchers wrote.

“Get down to their level and say, ‘You need a nappy change,’ and then pause so they can take this in.”

The guidance suggests that parents should take additional steps once notifying a baby of the diaper change.

“Then you can say, ‘Do you want to walk [or] crawl with me to the [changing] table, or would you like me to carry you?’” the report states.

Researchers recommend observing a child’s “facial expressions and body language to check if they understand what is happening.”

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“This can be a time to help children learn about consent and how their bodies work,” the authors wrote. They did not respond to a request for comment from The Post.

The suggestions fall under what is commonly referred to as “gentle parenting,” a child-rearing method that emphasizes empathy, communication, and connection over traditional forms of discipline.

The approach is often associated with millennial and Gen Z parents and has generated significant debate online.

The Deakin University guide also encourages involving infants directly in the diaper-changing process. Parents are advised to ask questions such as, “Can you please lift up your bottom so I can slide your nappy out?”

Researchers said that “these habits plant the seed of the idea that a child has the right to say what happens to their body.”

Yamalis Diaz, a clinical child psychologist with NYU Langone Health, told The Post that involving babies verbally during diaper changes can help prepare them for future conversations about bodily autonomy.

“This is more about integrating the teaching of consent into the [adult’s] parenting practices early on,” Diaz said. “It’s aimed at increasing the parents’ awareness of all the ways that the need for consent occurs in a child’s life.”

Diaz added that beginning these discussions early helps establish comfort with boundary-setting. “Parents and kids will be more comfortable talking about and establishing boundaries,” she said.

Lesley Koeppel, a psychotherapist based in New York City, agreed that parents can set the foundation for autonomy by narrating their actions.

“Babies cannot verbally agree or disagree, but parents can still narrate what they are doing,” she said. “This builds a foundation for bodily autonomy long before a child has language.”

Koeppel said the practice is “symbolic rather than literal,” adding that its message is intended to communicate, “You matter. Your body matters. I will always tell you what I am doing.”

The researchers urged parents not to distract infants with toys or songs during diaper changes.

“It’s important children notice when someone is touching their most intimate parts,” they wrote, noting that “even in early infancy, children can respond to consistent verbal cues.”

The guidance also recommends using anatomically correct terms during diaper changes and bath time, including “vulva,” “penis,” and “anus.”

“Parents may feel uncomfortable doing this and think more childish names should be used,” the researchers said. “But this keeps children safe, as it means they can then inform trusted adults about their experiences with all the people who care for them.”

The authors acknowledged that the suggested practices may feel overwhelming. “The habits we outline above may also seem to add more work to the already demanding parental load,” they wrote.

“So try and do them as often as possible and be kind to yourself if every nappy change isn’t a perfect moment of connection. You are supporting a small child after all.”

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