Minnesota House Releases Cringiest Poll Report Ever

Minnesota isn’t as anti-gun as you might expect, but it’s not for lack of trying. Despite the best efforts of Democrats in the state, they haven’t been able to go as far as they’d like, and that bothers them. It bothers them a whole lot.

So, they decided to shore up their arsenal of weapons for the next session, and that includes what one might call a poll.

I wouldn’t, but they might.

You see, the Minnesota House of Representatives Public Information Services Office report that about three-quarters of respondents favor an assault weapon ban. But guess where they held the poll.

Three-quarters of respondents to the 2026 House of Representatives’ State Fair Poll support banning the possession of semiautomatic military-style assault weapons in Minnesota.

Gun control became a contentious topic in the House during the 2026 session following the August 2025 shooting at Annunciation Catholic School that killed two children and injured 21 people. A gun violence prevention package containing the ban, proposed by the House DFL, became a major dispute between the two House caucuses in the final week of session and the session ended without a resolution.

The poll found that 75.2% of respondents favor a ban on the possession of semiautomatic military-style assault weapons, except peace officers, service members and other government officials authorized to possess a weapon while acting within the scope of their duties. In opposition to such a ban were 20.5% of polltakers, while 4.3% were undecided.

The annual poll was conducted by the nonpartisan House Public Information Services Office and is an informal, unscientific survey of issues discussed in prior legislative sessions that may again be topics of discussion in 2027. The 12-question poll was taken by 9,605 fairgoers this year, on par with last year when 9,945 people took part.

And by “informal,” what they mean is unscientific.

They basically just walk up to people, ask them questions, and write down the answers.

Oh, and where is the state fair held? Saint Paul.

That’s right, it’s held in one of the most anti-gun population centers in the state, and while state fairs draw from across the state, residents tend to make up a disproportionate number of attendees.

Now, having the poll isn’t a big deal. It can have its place with internal discussions and the like, but to release it to the public as if it matters, as if these percentages should be taken to actually mean something, is beyond idiotic.

Whoever decided to do this took a bus to school that had a lot less steel than on average, if you catch what I mean. I’m not saying they’re developmentally disabled, but they make Sloth from The Goonies look like Albert freaking Einstein.

Talk about weapons-grade cringe.

And the kicker is that it won’t matter. Even if Minnesota passes an assault weapon ban, it’ll be tossed by the Supreme Court, possibly before it can even go into effect.

Again, “Heeeeeeey, youuuuuuuuu guuuuuuuuuys!”

But they did it. Someone is apparently proud of this. They want the world to see it.

I do too. I want everyone to see every word.

I’m just pretty sure that my reasons are very different than theirs.