BREAKING: Totenkopf Out – Platner Quits

[Cue: The Party’s Over]

🚨 BREAKING — Democratic Nominee Graham Platner Drops Out in Maine Senate Race.pic.twitter.com/aGyigcV6LN

— InteractivePolls (@IAPolls2022) July 9, 2026

Okay, this is a lenghty and weepy bravura performance, and frankly, given the ego on display (hopefully for the last time), I really, REALLY did not expect this to happen. But if it did, I figured it would be a last-second pullout.

Platner held all the cards, and he threw them in early. 

.@MaineWireJon: “Graham Platner, like it or not, is the Democrat nominee. So he holds all the cards. The Democrat Party here in Maine is trying to act as if they do…He has been saying on the campaign stop, that he wants to blow it all up.” pic.twitter.com/jc93yaWnfr

— RNC Research (@RNCResearch) July 8, 2026

He’s stupid, but he’s not that kind of stupid.

His friends are as scummy as he is, but hey – Democrats.

To be clear, they’re attacking her for having texted that she needed a massage. It’s desperate and it’s disgusting. This is why women don’t report, by the way. https://t.co/TaQGm10roZ

— Magdi Jacobs (@magi_jay) July 8, 2026

But this did surprise me, and it makes my cynical self wonder what sort of largesse, either lucre and/or promises, has been passed around here?

Shoot – it’s hilarious. Fetterman is flaming him on Fox right now, and I’ll get you the video the second I can.

‘The trash took itself out…No one wants you anymore….Gives this weird long speech and pretend people aren’t going to forget you….You will only be remembered as the accused rapist who got kicked out…That’s your legacy, bro. Crawl back under that rock you came out from.’

He has a message for the Democrat leadership, too – 

‘…Why did you go in on this trashbag?…Bernie Sanders needs to apologize to everyone who donated to this dirtbag communist. He keeps pushing these communists…‘

Fetterman’s a treasure. Lordy.

What happens next?

Well, now the Democrats who wanted this and have spent the past week frantically casting about for candidates to substitute – hey, didja hear the one about the guy who bonks a chick in the head with water bottles?

The Maine Democrat floated as a possible replacement for scandal-plagued Senate candidate Graham Platner is accused of previously hitting a woman with a water bottle. https://t.co/Q7nCUkSt8f

— Washington Examiner (@dcexaminer) July 7, 2026

*scratch scratch scratch*

A friend of Platner’s is volunteering to step up in Spartacus style.

I AM GRAHAM PLATNER…SORT OF

In related news, Geiger told WMTW today that Platner is supporting her as his replacement. https://t.co/ZJ5IUXwdcl

— The Maine Wire (@TheMaineWire) July 8, 2026

And a beer guy who had thought about running earlier but got spooked by the specter of Janet Mills (!) has decided to once again throw his hat in the ring…if there is a ring.

Why didn’t this toad run in the primary? Was the fix in? Seems like it…

— SandyDixson (@SandyD836) July 8, 2026

Oh, gracious.

Dan Kleban will be touted as a viable Senate option.

I don’t think he has any Nazi tattoos or rape allegations under his belt, and Maine Beer Company is a real business, so he’d be an improvement for sure.

But let’s not forget that this is a guy who was scared out of the race… pic.twitter.com/o8mHY7fiyG

— Steve Robinson (@SteveRob) July 8, 2026

…But let’s not forget that this is a guy who was scared out of the race by Gov. Janet Mills. 

He also is owed no favors by the small group of Democratic insiders who will make replacement decisions. That will cut against him.

Anyhoo, the search goes on, as does a debate about how to delicately not pick another P-Hustle loser hosebag while still trying not to completely incense the communist base, who are going to be incandescent over losing their poster boy. Does the state party pretend to hold a mini-primary? Do they dare anoint someone?

This is going to be a poopshow of epic proportions.

What FUN!

Beege ADDS: First of the Fetterman I was able to snag.

LMAO! John Fetterman is on live TV ROASTING Graham Platner AND Bernie Sanders after Platner dropped out

“You will ONLY be remembered as the accused RAPlST that got pushed out of your election. That’s your legacy, bro.”

“Bernie Sanders needs to apologize to the voters of Maine… pic.twitter.com/G5LyL8YFc6

— Nick Sortor (@nicksortor) July 9, 2026

God, it was so beautiful.

🚨 JUST NOW: Sen. John Fetterman just demanded Sen. Bernie Sanders APOLOGIZE for pushing communist and alleged r*pist Graham Platner for Maine US Senate

“Bernie Sanders needs to APOLOGIZE to the voters of Maine and EVERYONE that donated to that train wreck! More than anymore, he… pic.twitter.com/gwTnmbWQcQ

— Eric Daugherty (@EricLDaugh) July 9, 2026

…”Bernie Sanders needs to APOLOGIZE to the voters of Maine and EVERYONE that donated to that train wreck! More than anymore, he pushed P Hustle into the election. And now, he keeps pushing these COMMUNISTS and awful anti-American people!”

“Bro, you are an accused R*PIST!”

“What did Democrats SEE in this guy? The nazi tattoo, the way he roughs up women?!”

“He will be remembered as an accused r*pist that was FORCED…he’s always been a dead man walking.”

“P Hustle, bro, you will ONLY be remembered as the accused r*pist that got pushed out of your election. That’s your legacy, bro! You’re the guy that cheats on your wife and roughs up your ex-girlfriend.”

“Adios, trash bag.”

God forbid I am ever as sorely stricken as John Fetterman was. I will pray with every fiber of my being to reemerge this strong and sound in mind and conviction.

Interestingly enough, Fetterman was on CBS earlier and asked about the replacement cycle if Platner dropped out. He pulled no punches again.

Absolute horror show.
Mass Governor Healey and Elizabeth Warren plus Bernie campaigned for him AFTER his nazi branding and other predator scandals went public.
What if he’d won?
Get these sociopaths out of office. pic.twitter.com/S2AIMtgtzq

— JulesLM (@Jlmartin1234) July 8, 2026

 …when it comes to selecting a possible replacement if Platner drops out of the Maine Senate race. 
“I remain fascinated with the left, just quickly just got all in for this total dirt bag,” Fetterman told CBS News’ Major Garrett.

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